Find the balance of Virtual and Reality

I bought a “smart” bike trainer in winter 2019 and enjoy riding on it with Zwift, but it felt so much more fun riding with others in a bike club, several of whom I have ridden with in-person on gravel rides last summer. This week I took part in my first group ride on Zwift, a Time Trial set up where we all started at the same time and with Zwift showing everyone’s progress as well as gaps between riders. I managed to stay with someone for most of the two laps before dropping off to a solid last place. Something to work on! Anyway, I loved that Zwift ride as it felt like a collective experience, yet it was augmented by knowing several of the riders, having ridden (and had food and drink at the pub afterwards) with in person, in the “real world”.

This has me musing on “Virtual and Reality” and which works for us in different ways, at different times and for different purposes.

One other recent example was that my son’s school in Cayman moved their Parent-Teacher-Student conference session at the end of the last term to an online format. They’ve had an online booking system in place for years, but the old system was that everyone went to the school hall and waited to rotate around teachers for each five-minute spot. Not only did you have to work out which teacher was at which desk so you could plot your path around up to 10+ teachers in an hour or so, but (see if this sounds familiar to any parents reading!) it never worked perfectly as those five-minute blocks of time, well, weren’t respected by all parents. Moving this online made all the difference in the world, a massive improvement! No need to find the teacher, you just clicked the link. No need to worry about the five-minute slot, the system rigorously enforced it. Oh, and I was 5,000 miles away and could join the meeting.

Those school meetings were radically improved by being online, and the relationship with the teacher is already so restricted (to about three or so of these rushed five-minute meetings) that it made no real difference to me that we did not meet in person.

Now, one last and current musing is that the same son is in a pivotal year in their education, their final year of high school, studying then sitting exams that will see them through to a university place in the UK for next year. Now, in common with many teenagers, they don’t love texting or calling with distant parents, but when I am not “virtual” but am there in “reality”, present in person, it makes a big difference for both of us. I was in Cayman for 17 days in August and September this year, the first time in Cayman in 18 months due to the pandemic, the first time seeing my sons in person. I saw my youngest son every day, even if just for a few minutes to check-in. It felt great.

So, time for some “reality” and not so much “virtual”. Dates aren’t set yet, but I plan to come to Cayman around the start of April for at least four weeks. Simply to be present, less virtual, more reality and at a time when he will be very much focussed on studying for those important exams from mid-May to mid-June. What will I do while there? I certainly have never been a “helicopter parent”, so not for that. I’ll simply be there. We’ll see each other every day, sometimes just for a hug and a few minutes, sometimes longer. Oh, and it will feed my soul in lots of ways to be home in Cayman, not only spending time with my three sons, but also so many friends, plus such an extended stay will give me the opportunity to do more work with the businesses and leaders of my island home, whilst also continuing working with current clients outside Cayman virtually for that period.

As we gradually emerge from the most restricted times of our pandemic lives, finding that blend between “virtual and reality” is something for us all to be conscious of and to design and plan for.