When it feels hard to listen to alternative views

“The willingness to believe crazy things increases when it feels like the world is dangerous and falling apart”

Prior to the pandemic, it has felt for several years to me that we are living in a time where we allow ourselves less and less to listen to alternative views. For me, one tipping point was around the 2016 US Election. At that time I stopped actively participating in Facebook, as I had developed a clear sense that a) dialogue was of people from alternative views shouting at each other without any true dialogue, and b) Facebook itself was amplifying us by feeding us more and more of what we already believed, rather than exposing us to alternative views. Of course, we later found out about Cambridge Analytica and more.

Now, the words of Defoe above from three centuries ago ring loudly and true during the pandemic. I have found and continue to find good friends taking views radically opposed to those I have developed over the past year. I do find it difficult on many levels, yet at the same time deeply appreciating those who model what I hope to do myself, which is listening to others with the intent to understand their views and where they are coming from.

For this, I highlight my friend Steve Moore (on twitter and also with frequent public posts on FB), a brilliant thinker across many areas from whom i have learned much for years. Steve and I often disagree at varying levels when we get into a discussion, including on the approach to the pandemic in the UK, yet he has always maintained an open dialogue and I have always felt he is open to listening to the views of others, whilst also taking time to read deeply and widely on both opinions and underlying facts and research. I hope he has felt the same of me in our discussions!

Also, last week I was on one of the random LunchClub calls I have each week. When I looked up the bio and posts of the person I was about to meet, I found that they held several views I greatly disagreed with. For a moment I thought to cancel the call but quickly reminded myself to listen and learn. We ended up having a great call, during which we agreed how rare and valuable it is at these times to be able to have a conversation with someone with widely differing views and really listen to each other. We even joked about the news sources we use. He noted how he had made himself read The Guardian and I said the same about The Times 😉

So, when it feels hard to listen to alternative views, I’ll keep focussing on listening and understanding.